If you are reading this post then you made it to the end of 2018. I think most can agree that this year seemed to go faster than any other year. The end of the year is typically a time to reflect on the past and dream for the future.
Reflection tends to come with regret or recognition of loss more than what you have gained. This is completely normal because as humans it is easier to focus on the negative versus the positive. We also are our worst critics. I can relate to this the most this year out of any other year other than 2015 when I lost my father. Recently when talking to friends and loved ones I found myself framing 2018 as my year of loss: loss of friends, business partners, relationships and almost my life (I was involved hit by a car while walking and had to learn to walk again). A friend simply responded, “Well what did you gain in place of these things?”
This response gave me pause. I was so busy focusing on what I felt was taken away from me that I could not see what I had gained or better yet that the lost of these things had made room for things to come.
In 2018, while I lost two friends I gained three more. I lost a business partner in a failing business but gained two partners in two projects that will bring me more success and money than any other previous businesses combined. I am no longer in a relationship but I gained my independence, confidence, clarity and self worth back. I loss the full range of motion in bending my knee from my car accident but the accident forced me to slow down which has improved my mental health (I also could have lost my life instead of just an injury in my accident). Essentially, the more I was forced to think about what I loss the more I realized what I had gained in its place. I also realized what we think is so great that we refuse to let go is keeping us from the bigger and better things that are in store for us! Do not be afraid to LET GO.
Trust me this “glass half full” perspective was not easy for me. I still have physical, mental and emotional scars from all my losses. The key is to not stay in the loss. No matter what keep moving forward so that God (life, the universe etc.) can fill those empty spaces from the losses in your life with all the wonderful new things to come (new job, new relationship, new business, new friends etc.). Some people say take it day by day. I sometimes take it hour by hour. Do whatever works best for you. I also recommend setting short term personal and professional “attainable” goals versus long term goals that will take more time and resources. Last but not least, treat yourself! A massage, a manicure, a trip even something as simple as ice cream are the little rewards we need to keep us motivated to move forward.
Here’s to pushing past the loss and making room for the NEW! Happy New Year! Wishing you nothing but success, love, laughter and freedom in 2019 and beyond!